Thursday, November 21, 2013
Uplifting Change Through Healing Words : Uplifting Change Through Healing Words Partnering ...
Uplifting Change Through Healing Words : Uplifting Change Through Healing Words Partnering ...: Domestic violence outreach is critical. This is especially true when many mothers are wondering how they will get a tree let alone gifts ...
Uplifting Change Through Healing Words Partnering with Angels Haven to Launch the new Angel’s Tree Program
Domestic violence
outreach is critical. This is especially true when many mothers are wondering
how they will get a tree let alone gifts for their children this year. The
holidays is a hard time for the survivors of domestic violence. Their hearts
and their homes are already broken. Some even feel so hopeless that they return
to their abusers thinking that they were right.
It is up to us to
help these women and children. Your donations will get gifts and Christmas
trees for those who need it most. A small donation doesn’t only restore
Christmas, but it also restores hope.
We cannot let these
families down. No child should lose their parent, home and see their mother
abused only to wake up on Christmas morning with nothing. We have to help, but
we cannot do it alone. This is going to take a village.
Please look into
your heart and find the spirit of the season. Help a family in need today. Every
little bit counts, and the time is running out to make a difference. Help us
spread the word, and restore hope to the hopeless.
Then some children
were brought to Him so that He might lay His hands on them and pray; and the
disciples rebuked them. 14But Jesus said, "Let the
children alone, and do not hinder them from coming to Me; for the kingdom of
heaven belongs to such as these."
Click Here to go to the Donations Page
Sunday, November 17, 2013
Uplifting Change Through Healing Words : Your Donations This Holiday Season can Turn a Vict...
Uplifting Change Through Healing Words : Your Donations This Holiday Season can Turn a Vict...: Where your money goes, and how you can help. These women and children need our help. Funds from the government are almost nonexiste...
Your Donations This Holiday Season can Turn a Victim into A Survivor
Where your money goes, and how you can help.
These women and
children need our help. Funds from the government are almost nonexistent. They
may be stuck in the violence or they could be finally free from it, in hiding
and worried about how they will make ends meet. This is where you and Uplifting
Change Through Healing Words can be there to make the difference.
Abuse and
domestic violence leaves lifelong scars, but healing is possible. The scars are
not just left on the victim that directly suffered, but also on the silent
victims, their children. These women and children need to have a lifeline when
they get the courage to break free, and they need to be educated on how to
break the cycles of abuse.
Their lives can
be changed just by making a donation the size of what you would pay in a week
for Starbucks. Your gift to Uplifting Change Through Healing Words will allow
us to provide services to the victims to release them or keep them from
returning to their abusers.
Donations allow
us to take crises calls, educate the community and the victims, council the
children, help with bills and referrals, help women and children to safely
relocate and so much more.
Uplifting
Change Through Healing Words can continue to be an answer to many prayers of
abused women and children (in most cases) who desperately need our help.
However, this is only possible with your help. Your donations will not only
restore hope, but it will transform lives. Please partner with us today with
anything that you can spare to make a difference today.
A donation of $30
will cover around 10 crises calls, $60 will help us to get one family to a local
shelter and $100 will provide an hour of counseling, help with a light bill, some
rent assistance or make all of the
difference whether or not a family will have a Christmas meal, gifts or even a
tree.
You Can Make A Difference!
Even if 10 people gave $5 that adds up to $50, so
every little bit helps these women and children, the elderly and sometimes even
men out of these horrific circumstances. There are a lot of families out there
who need you, and they have nowhere else to turn.
While donations of toys, warm clothing, shoes, even
Christmas trees and decorations, personal care products and the like are all
welcome donations this time of year at local Domestic Violence Shelters we ask
that you help us reach father through your financial contribution to Uplifting
Change Through Healing Words.
Financial contributions will help these healing
families with housing, awareness, counseling, rent and utility assistance,
legal issues and so much more. We can’t do it without you. Please, don’t turn
them away. By simply donating any amount that you can you will change a life.
Please see the donations link at the bottom of the
post to make a difference in the life of one family that will last a lifetime.
Follow us on Facebook
Join our Group Page by clicking here.
SUPPORT OUR MISSION TO HELP THOSE IN NEED AND BRING AN END TO THE
SUFFERING!
Psalm 82:3-4 (#3 of 20 Bible Verses about the Poor) 3 Defend the cause of the weak and fatherless; maintain the rights of the poor and oppressed. 4Rescue the weak and needy; deliver them from the hand of the wicked.
Saturday, November 16, 2013
Uplifting Change Through Healing Words : Domestic Violence Awareness: Are You Living With a...
Uplifting Change Through Healing Words : Domestic Violence Awareness: Are You Living With a...: While we are on a mission to gather funds to help the victims of domestic violence especially through the holidays it is important to also ...
Domestic Violence Awareness: Are You Living With a Narcissist
While we are on a mission to gather funds to help the victims of domestic violence especially through the holidays it is important to also bring awareness to end it.
Narcissistic people’s traits are the fundamental
source of self-love, self-empowerment and self-value. While everyone can have some signs of
narcissism, you know when you have encountered a true narcissist. A real
narcissist will have pathological traits that are akin to schizophrenia. For the
people around a narcissist the world can become a very volatile and cold place.
If you recognize the following traits then getting
help or getting out is crucial, but you don’t just leave a narcissist. You will
need help, and you cannot go back because despite their charm and soothe words
they will be set on revenge, and a narcissist never ever forgets. They are
cunning and unpredictable with a darkness in the pit of their being
incomprehensible to the rest of the world. They are camellias, so many times
they can even cause you to question your own sanity.
Strong narcissistic behaviors include but are not
limited to the following:
A narcissist requires attention from other people.
They prefer flattery, being put on a pedestal and everyone to love them but
they will take negative attention if that is all that they can get. They want
to be the center of the conversation and the center of attention all of the
time. They will do their best to eliminate anyone or anything they feel is
diverting your full attention from them, their needs, their want and the like.
Their reality revolves around them.
They cannot stand it when they are not being admired.
They are ego dystonic. This means that the narcissist will have thoughts and
exhibit behaviors that contradict their self-image, and to dumb it up even
more, they are not what they have made themselves believe they are. If you have ever wondered something along the
lines of “does he or she really believe the things he says” well he or she
probably does. Their reality is not the same as ours.
A narcissist does not care about clashing. They can
become very abusive, and ultimately it is not ever their fault in their mind.
They always blame others, and believe that the others or you are at fault. They
are incapable of blaming themselves. They will even try to convince you to no
end of how it is your or someone else’s fault.
The narcissist vilifies and criticizes others, but if
someone points out their faults it is setting the stage for a war. They love
praise but will discredit praise that they hear lavished on others.
They expect a ton of things of others, but you cannot
ask the narcissist for a favor. They are often misleading and dishonest, but
won’t admit the truth even if they are caught red-handed. What they will do is
turn it around on someone else or say you deserved it.
Narcissists are masters of disguise. They are
convincing liars, and they will have the world thinking you have a happy family
when in fact the home is in turmoil. They will always have a faithful following
that believes everything is your fault. They will collect evidence and even
falsify evident to use against and control you or others. They will hurt you in
any and every possible way that they can even at the expense of their own
children.
A narcissist will fabricate and exaggerate things to
mold a situation to their favor. They have a caviler disrespect for their
partner over time that begins to turn into constant emotional and mental abuse.
They feel they are entitled to be treated special and that they should have
special privileges. Many don’t even have control over their own body when they
live with a narcissist.
Narcissists are inter-personally exploitative and they
won’t hesitate to take advantage of another person to achieve their goal. They
will do anything to achieve their ends. They have no regard for what their
actions and words or their choices will affect others. Some even wonder if they
can feel empathy or if they even have a soul. They are either unwilling or
completely unable to identify with the needs or the feelings of another person.
They are almost sociopaths.
They are jealous hearted to the core, and rather than
admitting that they think others are jealous of them. They control the family
and the family’s finances. They are almost always haughty and arrogant.
Narcissistic traits can vary because there is more
than one type of narcissism, which ultimately is a personality disorder. He or
she must be the center of everything and their needs is all that matters. While
in public he or she may withdraw, smile or be the superb master of disguise
(ever so charming), in the home he or she will throw a tantrum.
His public face
is never the face (or rarely the face) seen in the home. The face that is
exposed in the home is real, while the public face is a mere disguise.
In private he can lecture for hours, he wants to cut
ties between you and the rest of the world, your family is a threat to him, if
he cannot turn you against them then he will try to burn every bridge by
turning them against you.
He will swear, insult, criticize and condemn while
nothing you do will ever be good enough for the narcissist. When he wants
something it is like nothing ever happened. The narcissist can even make an
attack seem like a casual conversation and leave you looking or feeling like
the out of control one.
PROJECTION
is one of the narcissist’s favorite tools.
This is when the narcissist projects things that they
are doing onto you. If the narcissist accuses you constantly of something they
are probably doing it themselves. They project their wrongdoing, their
behaviors and their negative or hurt feelings onto you. When the narcissist
isn’t happy nobody’s happy. Listen carefully to your narcissist, it can give
away things that they are thinking, planning and doing.
The narcissist craves sympathy. He will
paint a bad picture of everyone in your and his life including you (unless he
is dependent on you for something). Children pick up on parent’s behaviors. A
visitor may come to the house, and both parents will be calm while the child is
being loud or displaying bossy or angry behaviors. They pick up what happens
behind closed doors and are often a window into the reality of the home.
A narcissist will endlessly criticize
his own family and friends. He or she often thinks that people are out to get him,
using him or plotting against him. The narcissist often borderlines schizophrenia
in this area. Some times are more intense than others, but he or she will affixiate
on people thinking that they are in some personal attack or plot against them.
Seemingly everyone in the narcissist’s life will take a turn being the enemy.
Again, these are publicly charming
people who give you just enough humanity to hold on. When you live with a
narcissist it is emotionally, physically and mentally exhausting. It seems like
they leave you emotionally desolate and wondering why you can never get
anything right.
People who adjust to life with a narcissist will become ill,
depressed and maybe even suicidal. Some have even reported even feeling so
hopelessly trapped by the narcissist that their own mental well-being was at
jeopardy and the narcissist had caused them to think of harming them to just
stop the pain. If you reach this point you must get out. Sometimes the bonds
that hold us exist only in the mind of us and the narcissist.
Unfortunately the narcissist does have
the ability to make great impressions on others. For this reason they can
damage the reputation of almost anyone if they set their mind to it.
IN AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP WITH A
The deadly charm of a narcissist can
cause total emotional desolation and complete isolation of their victim. It is hard for any abused woman to reach out
for help, but a woman in the grips of narcissistic abuse it is almost
impossible. They fear the charm of their narcissist will turn the table on her
making her look like the abuser through their amazing ability of projection.
Oftentimes the fear of not being believed and the consequences that such a
seemingly heartless individual is capable of is crippling.
The rage of a narcissist is something
no one ever wants to face. They are relentless, ruthless and unpredictable.
Their rage sometimes shocks even them, and it is uncontrollable. Their rage
rarely if ever surfaces in public because they won’t run the risk of being
exposed. The emotional abuse in a narcissistic relationship is
incomprehensible, and if they ever resort to physical violence it too is
unimaginably horrific. They torture their victim on every level. Their attacks
can go on for days or weeks. Most people that encounter the couple will never
even pick up on the abuse.
These are controlling, non-empathetic
and dangerous individuals who are masterminds of abuse and control.
IT WILL ONLY GET WORSE AS THEY FEEL
THEY HAVE CONDITIONED YOU TO ACCEPT THEIR ABUSE.
You have to take your identity,
self-esteem and your life back. Leaving an abusive relationship is dangerous,
but leaving a narcissist is deadly. They will try to destroy you and everyone
around you. The only thing that you can do is contact a domestic violence
outreach program and relocate.
You cannot ever communicate with the narcissist
again, and you will have to hide from this person for the rest of your life. If
they find you then you will have to go into hiding deeper. As long as they know
where you are they will get to you at any cost. Leave the narcissist before
they kill you either physically or spiritually.
They will push you to suicide
or worse. You have to let go, and in light of it all it is the best thing that
you will ever do for your children even if you worry about them being in a
single pat=rent home.
Leaving the Narcissist
Don’t pack your bags without a safety
plan, and do not give the narcissist any inclination that you are leaving. You
may have to walk away from everything but your cloths and documents, but at
least you will have your life. Leaving a person with NPD (Narcissistic
Personality Disorder) is the most dangerous time for a victim. Even if they
give you permission to leave don’t do it with them being aware of it. You must
be careful.
Call the national
Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-877-988-5559
if you are in an abusive relationship. You are not alone.
Click
Here to Donate
to Uplifting Change Through Healing Words
to Help These Women find Their Way out of the War-zone they have been
Conditioned to call Home.
If they finally get the nerve to call
we have to be there.
Friday, November 15, 2013
Uplifting Change Through Healing Words : Donate to Domestic Violence Outreach this Holiday ...
Uplifting Change Through Healing Words : Donate to Domestic Violence Outreach this Holiday ...: Domestic violence outreach programs have been hit hard by lack of funding and budget cuts. As the funding decreases the amount of domes...
Donate to Domestic Violence Outreach this Holiday Season and Empower a Family in Need
Domestic violence
outreach programs have been hit hard by lack of funding and budget cuts. As the
funding decreases the amount of domestic violence related crimes during the
holiday season will double and in some places even triple.
While it is urgent
to get toys, clothing and the like to your local shelters it is also vital to
support programs like Uplifting Change Through Healing Words.
Many of these women
have exited the shelters and are now struggling single moms. These women are worried
about making ends meet, paying the bills and getting holiday meals or gifts for
their children. Uplifting Change Through Healing Words can and will get the funds
to where they are needed to really make a difference. However, it is up to the community
to get involved.
Uplifting change
through healing words is a program that strives to help the victims of domestic
violence as well as bring community awareness that will expose it and
eventually stop abusers in their tracks.
There has never been
a more important time to help, and when better than the holidays when the
spirit is one of giving and these families need your help more than ever. Even
if you can only give a few dollars it will add up.
We must become out
sisters keepers and stop domestic violence. These women need our support.
Please help us empower them through
your donations by clicking here. You can also visit my Facebook page
to offer your own Uplifting Words. We look forward to seeing you there.
Remember everything
counts. We need you, but most of all they need you. Please do not put off this critical
need in the community and in the homes of these women and children who are
struggling daily. The blessings that will come back to you will be innumerable.
After all, it is the meek at heart that will inherit the kingdom of God.
What Scripture Says?
Prov.
19:17 When you help the poor you are lending to the
Lord--and he pays wonderful interest on your loan!
1 John 3:17 But if someone who is supposed to be a Christian
has money enough to live well, and sees a brother in need, and won't help
him--how can God's love be within him ?
1
John 3:18Little
children, let us stop just saying we love people; let us really love them, and
show it by our actions.
1
John 3:19 Then we will know for sure,
by our actions, that we are on God's side, and our consciences will be clear,
even when we stand before the Lord.
Please
Support Uplifting Change Through Healing Words with Your Donations
and Prayers.
God
bless you, and happy holidays.
Wednesday, November 13, 2013
Uplifting Change Through Healing Words : You can Make a Difference for a Family in Need thi...
Uplifting Change Through Healing Words : You can Make a Difference for a Family in Need thi...: You can make the difference in the life of a mother who wouldn't have made it without you this holiday season. The holidays are a de...
You can Make a Difference for a Family in Need this Holiday Season
You can make the difference in the life of a mother who wouldn't have made it without you this holiday season.
The holidays are a desolate time for families in need, but none more than the single mother who just broke free from a domestic violence situation. For them these are scary and uncertain times. Many times they put on a strong face for their children by day, and they cry themselves to sleep at night worrying about tomorrow.
Not only these women survivors of domestic violence, many of them have had their confidence and self esteem beaten to almost nothing. While they are in the middle of healing the holidays can cause them to feel very defeated.
Many may even be tempted to return to their abuser for fear of not being able to make it (just like their abuser said they wouldn't be able to do). These are women who are struggling to make their ends meet, put food on the table, get the basic necessities for themselves, their children and their home as well as worrying about things like how they will make Christmas happen for their children.
In the spirit of the holidays it has never been a better time to help. Toys, winter clothing, shoes, coats, gently used furniture, Christmas trees and decorations and funds can all be donated and it will really make a difference in the lives of these families.
These women can use help with their utilities, rent and other basic essentials. They need our help. This is especially true with the government funding being cut to almost nothing or eliminated altogether for many Domestic Violence programs.
We cannot let these women feel that they cannot make it hence reinforcing their abusers words that most likely still ring in their ears. We have to join together in the true sense of giving and make a difference. We are our sisters keeper.
You can make toy, clothing, tree and food donations at your local shelters. Funds can be donated to Uplifting Change Through Healing Words for assistance with bills, rent and the like. Don’t let these women fall between the cracks. If we ban together they can make it with the support of the community and domestic violence outreach programs like Uplifting Change Through Healing Words.
You can contact me on my Facebook page and donations can be submitted by clicking here. Give the gift of a better tomorrow this holiday season and make the difference in the life of a family in need today.
"Charity begins at home, but should not end there"- Thomas Fuller
Thursday, November 7, 2013
Updates
Click here for Our Facebook Page
Click here for Our Donations Page
Domestic violence needs to end.
Help us make an uplifting-change.
Uplifting Change Through Healing Words : Domestic Violence during the Holiday Season is not...
Uplifting Change Through Healing Words : Domestic Violence during the Holiday Season is not...: Are you in a dv situation? What are the types of dv, what are the effects dv has on children and a lot more. Education is freedom, not ...
Domestic Violence during the Holiday Season is not only Very real but it will Increase; What we as a Community Need to Know
Are you in a dv situation? What are the types of dv, what
are the effects dv has on children? Education is freedom, not
just for the people suffering from DV but for their family, neighbors, friends
and passersby. It is a matter of life and death.
Domestic violence is everybody’s problem. However,
a lot of times people choose not to see, or they simply do not recognize the signs.
Children are traumatized, women broken, elderly abused and lives lost right
under our noses, and all of the time there was something we could have done
about it. We as a community must do our part to recognize, reach out and help
families who are struggling with this epidemic. It is more common than you
think. Let’s take a look at DV.
I warn you some content and images may be
troubling. Still, they are very real, and it is time to expose domestic
violence for the devil and evil that it really is.
Domestic
Violence and the Holidays
While we go through our holiday festivities know
that abuse in many homes is escalating. Don’t count donations to domestic violence
charities, outreach programs and local shelters out, because they need you now
more than ever throughout the holiday season.
Some think it may be the pressure of the holidays,
the memories from childhood or other stressors that cause tempers to flare up
during the holidays, but the truth is no one really knows, sometimes not even
the abuser and certainly not the people being abused.
So many people do not know why the victims stay,
and there are even some who think they deserve or like it because they stay or
return. Unfortunately it is not as easy as walking out. A woman (or anyone
being abused) are in the most danger leaving and right after they have left.
There is also threats to them, family and other repercussions
threatened that make it hard. The control and power an abuser has on their victim
is horrendous, and leaving is the single hardest thing an abused person will
ever do. Those are the strongest chains to break, and no one who has never been
bound by them will ever truly understand it. A woman will leave more than 5
times in many cases before she finally breaks free. We will get into the types
of abuse later, and that will hopefully make it a bit easier to understand.
The holidays present every risk factor to become a reality.
It is certain that the numbers of those battered will rise during holiday
seasons pushing already financially strained domestic violence shelters and
outreach organizations to and past their limits. There are so many cases that
some won’t be able to get help if we do not pull together and do our part to
make sure the funds and things needed are not in place when the crises calls
come in. If a woman (or any abused
person) finally gets the courage to call for help then we need to be able to
help them ort all hope may be lost and they may die in that situation.
The adults are not the only ones affected by
domestic violence. The silent
Domestic violence in essence can take many
different forms, and all of them take a devastating toll on the one being
abused and the children in the home. It is basically purposeful intimidation. It
combines all or one if not several aspects ranging from assault, sexual abuse
and the threat or act of violence.
This is not a problem found only in poverty
stricken areas or in the home of certain cultures or races. Domestic violence
simply does not discriminate. One out of four homes are effected by domestic
violence. Many cases go unreported. Crises calls will increases by almost ½ during
the holidays, and many calls never come because people think they have to keep
their kids in the home through the holidays.
Most of the time when a crises call comes in
the persona being abused knows that if they do not get out right then it will
be bad. Many are fleeing for their life and leaving all they have behind just
to survive.
If you are in an Abusive Situation and decide not to Leave Do the Following:
Though getting
out is always the best thing to do, some won’t go. If you are not ready then
have a safety plan. Stash some clothes, important documents and keys somewhere
outside the home with a friend. Have some money, a cell phone that your abuser
knows nothing about and medications if you need them.
Know where
you will go if you have to leave. You also need to know to avoid rooms like the
garage, bathroom, kitchen and upper levels of the home if an argument breaks
out. Avoiding rooms with weapons and reducing the chance bodily harm is
essential to your survival. Be sure to note the bathroom is dangerous as well
because of all of the hard surfaces and its enclosure.
Practice how
you will safely get out of the home, make sure your children know when and how
to call 911 from a neighbors phone if they can get out of the home. Having a code
word and a meeting place will help as well. Know who you can count on for help. If you can
get to your car drive to the police station. Protect all of your internet activities
and online accounts. Make sure your neighbors are aware and will call 911 if
they hear an incident.
Whether it is mental, physical, verbal, emotional
or sexual all victims and survivors concur that the holidays are a dreaded time
in the home of dv. Since most abusers isolate their victims and beat their self-esteem
down so badly while making them completely dependent financially,
geographically and the like getting help takes an act of great courage.
Some
women (of the abused) do not even know that there are options out there for
them, and many feel they couldn't make it on their own or that their abuser
will harm or take the children. If a woman finds the courage to call, she must
have some help or it will only reinforce her feelings of being helplessly
trapped.
With the recent budget cuts for these
services, it is up to the community to step up to the plate. While crises calls increase funding decreases. We are many of these women’s and abused people s only
hope for a new life or even survival.
If the holiday cheer is less than cheerful
and domestic violence ensues, stay as calm as possible and exercise the safety
plan you have established. Give the greatest gift of love, call the National
Domestic Violence Hotline at 1(800) 799-SAFE for
yourself or someone you love.
It is vital that you donate funds to
Uplifting Change through Healing Words to help women and children in these
situations, as well as clothes, toys and the like to local DV shelters and
educate yourself on this epidemic. Do your part. It is time we take out place
on the front lines in the war against DV and let these victims know that they
are not alone!
Impact
of Domestic Violence on Children
The children of domestic violence are often called the
silent victims. Children exposed to dv are more likely to have great
difficulties in life than their peers. They are also more susceptible to becoming
disturbed, depressed, bullies, abusers, abused, addicts or a number of other devastating
things in their life. It is not something left behind when they leave behind,
rather it is something they spend their whole life trying to overcome.
These are children who will suffer behavioral, social,
and emotional problems. They may
become antisocial, psychopathic, depressed, suicidal or aggressive just to name
some. Many will isolate, becoming hostile, angry and oppositional. They
will also develop attitudinal problems
and cognitive problems in most cases. Again, it is up to us to make sure there
are resources in place to prevent these children from being forever consumed by
the effects of dv. If all of us do a little it can add up to a whole lot!
Comprehensive
assessment regarding children's experiences and trauma symptoms, as well as the
protective factors present, should inform decision-making regarding the types
of services and interventions needed for individual children and families
living with violence.
Types
of Abuse
It is an unfortunate misconception that id a woman (or
abused individual) is not bruised and battered that they are not being abused.
Abuse takes on several faces, and all of them are equally as devastating. Please
take a moment to educate yourself on what dv looks like.
Verbal
and Emotional Abuse
Insults, threats, insults, monitoring, controlling,
intimidating and isolating are some good examples of this type of nonphysical
abuse. Humiliation and belittling as well as making someone feel they aren't “good
enough” or that they “never get it right” are some other examples of it.
Undermining an individual’s self-worth, competency and abilities
are some of the many forms of emotional abuse. Constant criticism, name calling, manipulating
feelings, inducing guilt and subverting the relationship between the victim and
the children are also all abusive behaviors. Another form of emotional abuse
may be consistently breaking promises and misleading someone only to tear them
down. This is a devastating form of abuse, and many say it is far worse than
physical abuse.
Financial abuse is not uncommon. A lot
of abused people do not have their own source of income or access to funds.
Those who do are closely monitored and controlled. When someone uses money to
control another person or manipulate them it is abuse. When someone starts to
manipulate and control finances or shut off access to the family funds the
stage is being set. This is a way of implementing total power over a victim and
in a sense rapping them.
Physical Abuse
While
this is not the most devastating it is the most dangerous form of abuse. When someone intentionally harms or
intimidated you with physical contact it is abuse. This is shoving, hitting,
pushing, punching, pinching and any other hurtful or intimidation physical
contact. Even holding someone down to intimidate and overpower is abuse, and
this often escalates.
Sexual abuse is very real in homes of
dv. This is the act of impacting any personas ability to control their sexual
choices. Whether it be restricting birth control, forcing unwanted sex or
withholding sex it is sexual abuse. Even if you are forced to participate
because you fear retaliation it is rape if your abuser knows that you do not
want to perform. Many abusers will do this after an emotional or physical
outburst and even use it as a punishment or a way to degrade their victim.
Putting someone down sexually, forcing them to “tell stories” or relive horrible
sexual abuse, forced porn and any sexually deviant acts of the like are all
forms of sexual abuse. Criticizing someone’s sexual performance and desirability
are also forms of sexual abuse. Children in these homes risk being abused
sexually by the abuser as well.
Digital Abuse and Psychological
Technology has aided in creating an entirely
new form of abuse. This can be done online, through social media, texting and
the like to intimidate, bully and harass. This is a form of stalking, and stalking
online often leads to stalking in person. Many times this is used to make the
victim fearful. The abuser will threaten to take or kidnap children, harass,
blackmail, harm pets and menace their victim relentlessly trying to break them
down through fear and intimidation. This is against the law and charges can be
filed.
Letter from a Survivor in the Throes of Escaping Her Abuser
I
remember hearing my other being beaten, I swore I would never become a victim,
and I did not understand why she kept us there, until I became the one things I
swore I would never be…an abused woman- trapped by circumstance paralyzed by
fear and completely codependent on my abuser.
Every day I fear he will do something to harm me and my
daughter. I never thought he would hurt her, but now we are in counseling for
sexual abuse. I do not know what the future holds, but without Uplifting Change
I know I would not have a future to worry about.
I want to thank the people who made my escape possible and
who are still helping me to rebuild today. Leaving is the easy part once you
are finally away, rebuilding may take a lifetime and without the support and
outreach I would not be able to do it even now that I am free.
Who is Uplifting Change, and how you can help make an Uplifting Change in the Life of a Family in Crises
Uplifting Change Trough Healing Words is a new organization.
We are in desperate needs of affiliates, funds and volunteers to make this a successful
mission to end domestic violence one family at a time.
We need help to make
sure that when the calls come in we are here to help. We are also reaching out
to instill hope in the survivors and help them get the referrals, resources and
help they need to break free.
We offer literature and hope. We ask that you
please help with any small amount to assist these families, because none should
ever be denied escape from abuse. Also please donate toys, shoes, clothing and
the like to your local DV shelters.
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